I try to leave the house as much as possible, but I feel guilty. ![]() but only because my dad gets sad when he sees me sad. instead of hurting yourself trying to put it all back together. and I’m trying to put it back together, but it seems like I’m trying to fix a broken mirror. Sometimes I sit in bed and cry because I don’t know what to do. But don’t get me wrong I love my brother. People think he is a gentleman, but his what I see as an asshole, excuse my language, but that is one way to describe him! He only listens to my mum. My brother is very quiet boy, not behind the curtains though. We know where she was, but she always tells us she was at my auntie’s place. sometimes she leaves the house for hours and hours, and comes back. My mum is a gambler, but she doesn’t admit it. Sometimes when I see my dad I get sad, and tell him, ‘‘you are working, but it’s like your working to pay for your grave’’ because working to hard like my dad can bring you to a horrible state where all you do it work and work, and get old, and not get rewarded. I can see where both of them are coming from though. he thinks for the future, he will work and work and work until he cant feel his back, just so he can pay a bill but my mum, she’s more of a sit back and let the money come to her type of woman, which doesn’t help at all. Both my parents have two different philosophies on life. which kind of left us in a financially unstable situation. My mums a woman with a strong personality, a wonderful woman. Walking to the kitchen and seeing my dad sleeping on the coach, when he paid for this roof to be over our head. Little things that I see shatter my heart though. I would jump in front of a bullet for them any day. I always feel as though I’m stuck in the middle. My dad does everything for us, yet there hate for him is in describable. but now for some reason my brother hates my dad, and I don’t know why. They are just together for me and my brother. Coming from a broken family that’s still together, yeah, my parents are still together, but they don’t even look at each other. It’s a parent’s duty to make difficult choices.I have learned a lot in just my seventeen years of life so far. Your child is more important, so make sure their feelings come first. When you lose control, do not let ego take precedence over what’s important - your child and your relationship together.ĭo not be afraid of admitting that you’ve lost control. If they cannot maintain control, they have to consider seeking professional help. So it’s important why parents must maintain control. They not only feel physically threatened by how parents fight and get angry, but they feel that the relationships itself is also in danger. Parents must realise that a display of anger affects children on multiple levels. When parents fight, your child is more important Reconnect and and have a normal parent-child connection Don’t make up for or cover up what happened. Ask your kid for advice or how they can help. ![]() Explain what happened and how your kid experienced it. When parents fight or get angry, it’s frightening and threatening to a child. Reflect on what the child has seen and experienced. Regulate your own emotions before trying to regulate your child’s. If you need to remember the steps in which you can help your child recover from witnessing how parents fight, remember these four steps: Invite your child to sit in a safe and comfortable space. Once you’re calm and have empathised enough with your child’s experience, make a sincere effort to reconnect with your child. “It will likely reactivate your emotions a little.” 3. “Don’t do this until you are calm,” warned Donhauser. Was there violence when you fought with your partner? Did either of you throw something across the room or break something? Any adult is bigger, stronger, louder, and scarier than them. If your kids have seen you angry, you should see the situation and the aftermath from their perspective. Do you remember those times when, as a child, you saw your parents (or any two adults in your life) fight in front of you? How did it make you feel? What did you wish they did for you to make you feel better? Parents should know how to empathise with their child. Reassure them that you will talk to them about what happened after you calm down. But remember to explain first to your child what’s happening, and what’s going to happen. ![]() If you’re having difficulty calming down or it’s just taking a long time, take a walk.
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